How Many Horsemen Are There Coming?

In another premonition of the end times, Hollywood is casting for Dallas, the movie. Currently under consideration are John Travolta as JR, J. Lo as Sue Ellen, Luke Wilson as Bobby Ewing, and Shirley MacLaine as Miss Ellie. WTF??? Didn't they at one point have ideas in Hollywood? Did I have some head trauma that made me imagine that? [article]